Excellence Isn’t Perfection: A Conversation on Letting Go for Women in Business

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Apr 20

Speaker presenting to a group of women at a Heels and Handshakes Nashville networking event for women in business.

We often use the words excellence and perfection as if they mean the same thing. But they don’t.

At a recent Heels & Handshakes event in Nashville, hosted at Emerson Hall, we explored a powerful idea with speaker Katie Gustafson: excellence is rooted in care and intention, while perfectionism is often driven by fear.

Fear of not being enough.
Fear of getting it wrong.
Fear of being judged.

And sometimes, perfectionism looks so much like excellence that we don’t question it.

When success starts to feel heavy

From the outside, everything can look right—structure, discipline, achievement.

But internally, it can feel very different.

Burnout. Anxiety. Disconnection.

Katie shared that it’s possible to be doing everything “right” while slowly losing yourself in the process. That realization led to a shift—from proving worth to building self-trust.

For many women in business in Nashville, this experience can feel familiar, especially in fast-paced and high-growth environments.

One of the most insightful takeaways was understanding why we feel this pressure.

Some seek approval.
Some seek control.
Some seek security.
Some seek peace.

But underneath it all is a belief many professionals carry:

“I am only valued if I perform.”

This belief often shows up in work, leadership, and even networking environments.

Choosing growth over perfection

Perfectionism doesn’t always look obvious. It can show up as over-preparing, overthinking, or saying yes too often just to avoid disappointing others.

These habits can seem productive, but over time they become exhausting.

There’s a powerful difference between these two thoughts:

“I have to get this right.”
“I care about this, and I’ll do my best.”

One is rooted in fear. The other in trust.

Many of these patterns come from stories we created earlier in life to protect ourselves or help us belong. While they once served a purpose, they don’t always support who we’re becoming.

Instead of judging those patterns, we can gently ask:

Is this helping me grow?
Or holding me back?

A community that supports women in business in Nashville

Sometimes, growth starts with small shifts.

Noticing when perfectionism shows up.
Choosing to respond differently.
Allowing “good enough” to be enough.

Perfectionism promises safety, but often creates pressure.
Excellence allows space for growth, mistakes, and authenticity.

And sometimes, the most meaningful shift is believing that you are already enough.

That’s the kind of conversation and connection we continue to build at Heels & Handshakes.

In Nashville, our events bring together women who want to grow their careers, build meaningful relationships, and support one another in business and beyond.